Sunday, May 11, 2014

Mac vs Windows | Windows can do anything

Wednesday, May 7, 2014

Royal Houses from "The Game of Phones"

game of phones
Nokia/Windows  <-> Targaryen:
Nokia would definitely be the Targaryen. Nokia were once the undisputed Kings would built the Kings Landing, now overthrown because of some Mad King who was too egoistic to adapt to the changing world of handheld devices. “Burn Them All”. Now just like Danny they are trying to regain what truly is theirs.

Apple<-> Baratheon:
Apple was the one who started the revolt. We can pretty much relate to the revolution brought by Apple in the world smartphones and the revolt started by Robert Baratheon. Now history tells a different story Apple rules the whole of Westeros. The Baratheon who started the revolution is now dead and like King Robert, Steve Jobs too never knew how to rule.

Samsung<-> Lannister:
I am able to see the face of Tywin Lannister in the logo of Samsung. Apple maybe all royal and shiny but Samsung shit gold. They mine smartphone like lannister mine gold. A wide range of phone covering all grounds, leaving no stone unturned. From low cost mini versions to high end fully loaded handheld devices. And no matter what Samsung have paid their debt to Apple more than once.

Motorola are my Starks. They are the house of honorable men and women. Very much like Starks they are surviving the cruel world of smartphones. King in the North, I mean good quality electronic devices. They are champions in their own right. You have to wait and watch “Winter is Coming”.

Sony smartphones are no different from the Tyrells. They too have a shit load of money and maybe its more than the Lannisters… sorry Samsung. Sony possess the style, elegance and royalty like the Tyrells.

LG would be Dornish from the far south of Westeros. We can easily have an eye for the dornish wine and women just like LGs flagship smartphones Optimus and G series.

HTC is more or less like the Tullys. Their kingdom is not big like the Apple and Samsung, but are Honorable like the Motorola.

Blackberry will be the Greyjoys who at one point were the great Kings of the Iron Islands. What went wrong hmmmm. I think their over prized shitty smartphones. The idiots launch a phone for high prize and when no one is buying they slash the rates directly by half. “What is dead may never die Blah blah” foolish.

These little smart devices are like parasite. No class no quality and can stoop so low just to get the business running.

Karbonn are the Boltons. Villainous creatures lurking in the dark.

And last but not the least HP and Lenovo smartphones are the Arryns. They are there in the story, everyone mentions them but they are hardly visible.

Monday, May 5, 2014

Simple Funda of World Economics - "If You have 2 Cows"

You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies and the economy grows. You retire on the income.

You have two cows. You worship them.

You don't have any cows. You go to your friends house where he hospitably offers one of his cows as a gift. You tell all your other friends who tell all their
friends; before your hospitable friend knows it he has thousands of Pakistanis at his door.

You have two cows. You sell one and force the other to
produce the milk of four cows. You profess surprise
when the cow drops dead. You put the blame on some
nation with cows and naturally that nation will be a
danger to mankind. You wage a war to save the world
and grab the cows.

You have two cows. You go on strike because you want
three cows.

You have two cows. You reengineer them so that they
live for 100 years, eat once a month and milk

You have two cows. They are both mad.

You have two cows. You don't know where they are. You
break for lunch.

You have two cows. You redesign them so that they are
one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce
twenty times the milk. You then create cute cartoon
cow images called "Cowkimon" and Market them

You have two cows. You count them and learn you have
five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42
cows. You count them again and learn you have 17 cows.
You give up counting and open another bottle of vodka.

You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them.
You claim full employment, high bovine productivity
and arrest anyone reporting the actual numbers.

You have two cows. You don't know economy. You choose
one of them as the Prime Minister.

Fully Faltoo - Bollywood Classroom type PJs

An elephant was in love with a she-elephant. But the
she-elephant went and got married to some other elephant. So our
elephant was very Depressed. One of his friends felt sorry for
him, and took him to a park to cheer him up. In the park, they
sat on a see-saw, but the see-saw broke. Now, which song would
our hero sing?
Ans: "See-saw ho ya dil ho, aakhir toot jaata hai."

Question: Two hairs on a bald man's head fall in love with each
other and want to get married, but cannot. Why?
Ans: Because under Indian laws, "baal vivaah" is illegal.

Question: One fine morning, Ravan felt guilty day for all his
bad deeds.  He felt that he should go an apologise to Ram for
all the problems he had caused. So he went to Ram's house and
knocked on the door. Ram opened  the door and was surprised to
find Ravan standing there. Ravan just kept staring  and thinking
but didn't say a word. What was he thinking?
Ans: "Kis mooh se maafi maangoon?"

Question: How do you "cut" roads?
Ans: By laughing... because "Haste haste cut jaye raaste".

Question: Luv and Kush are going to a village and pass by a
well. Luv falls into the well. Why?
Ans: Because Luv is blind.

Question: Now, Kush also jumps in. Why?
Ans: Because Luv ke liye saala Kush bhi karega!

Question: Jackie Chan ki saas ka naam kya hai?  ................
Socho, socho. Nahi pata?
Ans: D'Cold; Because... Chan ki saans - D'Cold

Question: Chalo ab batao, Jackie Chan ki bahu ka naam kya hai?
This one's really simple...
Ans: D'Cold again... Kyunki saans bhi kabhi bahu thi :-)

A railway station beggar meets another beggar. A software
engineer meets another software engineer. Both of them ask the
same question to each other. What is the question? "So, which
platform are you working on?"

Question: What do you call a person who is leaving India?
Ans: Hindustan Lever.

Question: What do you call a person who leaves India, but
doesn't  travel much?
Ans: Hindustan Lever Limited.

Question: Kalidas ka ek bhai joote banata tha. Uska naam kya
Ans: Adidas.

Question: Prasad asks Kumble to bring a Pepsi. Kumble brings a
bottle, but takes it directly to Tendulkar. Why?
Ans: Because Tendulkar is an opener.

Question: Who is Joe?
Ans: Kambakth ishq... Because "Kambakth ishq hai Joe!"

Question: The Madrasi said, I want to see the movie "my heart is
an umbrella'. Which movie did he really want to see?
Ans: Dil Chhaata Hai

Thursday, May 1, 2014

ADVICE FOR WOMEN - Try to Understand Your Man

1. Don't imagine you can change a man unless he's in diapers.

2. What do you do if your boyfriend walks-out? You shut the door.

3. If they put a man on the moon -- they should be able to put them all up there.

4. Never let your man's mind wander -- it's too little to be out alone.

5. Go for younger men. You might as well, they never mature anyway.

6. Men are all the same - they just have different faces, so that you can tell them apart.

7. Definition of a bachelor; a man who has missed the opportunity to make some woman miserable.

8. Women don't make fools of men -- most of them are the do-it-yourself types.

9. Best way to get a man to do something, is to suggest they are too old for it.

10. Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.

11. If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital.

12. The children of Israel wandered around the desert for 40 years. Even in

biblical times, men wouldn't ask for directions.

13. If he asks what sort of books you're interested in, tell him checkbooks.